Weigh In Tonight

I am pretty sure I gained. Wine and chocolate and crappy days at work add up.

Oh well.

Success!

Last Weigh In - 145.6
Yesterday's Weigh In - 144.4
Total = -1.2
Total left to lose = 9.4

I feel really good about this loss.

Weigh In Day Day

I weigh in today and I feel excited. I think deciding to switch to meetings is a really valuable decision. Ritualizing my weigh in, in some way, while others are present, it makes it feel important, it makes it feel special.

I am so unbelievably happy right now. Anders and I have decided to do something very impulsive and buy tickets to Ecuador, we are going in two and a half weeks. We still need to buy the tickets tonight, but after that everything is in place. I got work off, he got work off and, incredibly, miraculously, we can both afford to do this right now. I am so, so excited to see my host families and get out and explore that beautiful country. We decided we want to make it adventurey so we're going to do things like hiking, white water rafting, swimming, etc. for most of the trip. Hopefully I won't gain too much there, it is actually pretty easy to make healthy choices and all of the outrageous, amazing, exotic fruits will be in season, which will keep me snacking healthfully.

Here is an adequate representation of what my trip in Ecuador will be like.



In addition to that good news is that I went to my physical therapist's office on Monday (walked there) and they noted some major improvements to my leg and went over my exercises with me. They said that Yolanda had developed an excellent routine for me and that I'm doing all the right things for my body.

Not being active for all those months really took a lot away from me. I felt disempowered, depressed and unhappy with my body and now that I'm working out again I'm feeling strong and capable and watching things change again. And now I know how I did it last time and I am going to do it again.

Ahhh, things seem too, too good.

August Goals

Here are my goals for August:

1. Make it the gym 12 times this month - I'll get $20 off my fees if I accomplish this, plus I think it's just a good goal to have.

2. Keep up my strength training twice a week - I've been able to do this so far. I really enjoy it and feel confident on the weight machines. Plus, yesterday I found a muscle I didn't have before. It is very cute and tiny and I'm excited to keep noting progress.

3. Get back on my bike - I have technically been allowed to be on for months, but for some reason I feel scared and apprehensive to ride again. It's been a year since I was told I had to stop riding and getting back on seems daunting. A lot of this is linked to my bike accident and how much I've had to think about it lately because of physical therapy. Agh. So, the first step (because I am paranoid) is making Anders look at it to make sure it is in tip-top shape before I go on my ride and schedule a very small and doable little trip with a friend so that I am accountable.

4. Do a major "spring" cleaning. My old roomate is moving out and my friend Krista is moving in. I want to finish my room, hang some pictures, put up shelving, clean out all of our closets and storage and, hopefully, get rid of a lot of junk.

5. Lose 2 lbs. I think this is doable. That would put me at 143.6.

6. Track Every Week.

7. Do my physical therapy exercises 5 times a week. These are a very easy thing to procrastinate and some weeks I am good, some weeks I am bad. 5 would be good and the days where I have no time won't make me feel so guilty.

Feeling optimistic!

Meetings.

I've decided to start doing meetings because doing it alone isn't working anymore. I went last night and I felt like I needed to be there. It was great. I weighed in at 145.6 lbs and my goal weight is set at 135 lbs. My goal is to lose .5 lbs a week because it's manageable. That way I should be at goal by January 1st. I think part of my difficulty is that I've been unrealistic about my weight loss goals and just expecting it to magically happen.

I'm proud of my progress and feel like I can commit to this. I have been working really hard at my weight lifting routine and it feels great plus I got a compliment on my tricep last weekend! Never have I ever had a compliment on any muscle. It made me feel like a stone-cold fox.

Benched- Warning: Angry post.

I am feeling really frustrated. After a really great work out Wednesday I felt so confident and strong and back on the road to recovery. The last two nights though my leg has been really, really hurting. I called my physical therapist and I've been benched. Agh! It just sucks. Feeling so empowered and then having it taken away. And it's hard for me not to feel angry- angry at my body, angry at the physical therapists who misdiagnosed me and took hundreds of my dollars and hours of my time with zero benefit. I'm starting at zero again, and although it's going better than it did the first time around, I'm not going to be all better, which was my unrealistic and very optimistic expectation.

The worst part is that my leg is a phantom malady. It isn't a specific problem but several different problems including a bad ankle, uneven hips, stiff heels, and extremely, freakishly tight muscles so it's so hard to identify what causes what pain, what to avoid. I don't know why it hurts so much today - is it the yoga I did on Tuesday, overdoing physical therapy stretches, the way I sit at work, my crappy sandals, my warm up, carrying too much at work (literally, boxes, etc), the way I slept last night?

I should probably just track the pain the way I track my points and look for patterns. Just one more thing.

Moving Weight.

Good news! Although I did not stay on track last week, it was very active with all of my activities, which must have compensated for something because in the last two weeks I lost 2.5 lbs. I am now at 145 lbs. and only 10 lbs away from goal weight. Hurrah!

One of the reasons my weigh ins are so inconsistent is because I've only been using the scale at the Uptown Y but I switch off between Uptown and Midtown frequently. My scale at home is totally crappy and will change up to 1.5 lbs within 5 minutes. How do you all weigh in?

It's been a pretty active week so far, canoing Monday, yoga Tuesday, gym today. I had some personal training sessions and developed a weight routine that I really enjoy and have actually been looking forward to all day. I went so long without feeling the pleasure of really making my body work. It's so good to be active again.

Oh, and here's a link to a recipe website that I really like and is very pretty to look at.

I think one of my goals for the weekend will be to try and make this blog a little more attractive and even develop a mission about what I need it to accomplish for me. So far it's just been a hodge podge of thoughts without any truly significant aims. I think this could be an excellent tool if I just identified how I want to use it.